But someone dared her to give a fuck. Someone dared her to care, to share herself with the world and with that, she's gone. Disappeared into the atmosphere. If she is to share herself, Earth was the bottom of the pile so the only location was above the petty frustration.
But her actions are not reflective of her behavior. She's coming back...when she's good and ready. You see, under achieving is her forte, her modus operandi, how she rolls. And it upsets those around her off to no end because history shows that underachievers are given all the attention. Although that's not her intention, she can read aggression written across the foreheads of those same silent onlookers.
The silence in the room is deafening, enough to fill the Grand Canuon many times over. And taking the seat against the back wall makes looking over her shoulder difficult, almost impossible. But she does it anyway. Instincts take over when yo're asked to fight or flee. Lucky for everyone around she's a fighter...on her own time. Pick and choose your battles wisely.
This definitely is not a battle she needs to fight, she tells herself. She doesn't need it, she doesn't feel it.
"She said the game's got your heart, the streets have got her soul..."
And for some odd reason, the past and her brain are in this battle of 'tenant and landlord', because someone is late with the rent check and after being evicted, has yet to leave the premisis.
The thing with trying to hide the past, suppress history is that learning from it becomes that much harder. Resentment sets, and that pounding in her chest is amplified and before she knows it, she's on her feet running again. Just like when she was a child. Young and reckless but scared and careful.
There is no relief in sight. Words don't relieve, people don't believe, societal standards deceive, no one can take the heat. Just breathe in, hold, now exhale. It's all gone now, and she's alone. Back to the beginning because winning is overrated, and she's never one to finish too soon. Her only hope each morning? To live and see the moon. Then it starts all over again.
